dead

Release Date: 3/99

Album: THE SCAPEGOAT FACTORY

Writer: ADAM MARSLAND

Audio:

 

Lyrics:

I used to care about what you thought

I still do, but I ought not

And though I won't change overnight

Now I know you were left and wrong

And I was right and right

 

I'm not gonna think like you

Gonna do as I say not as youíd have me do

And 'cos Iíd rather be happy instead

I'll imagine youíre dead

 

I used to see things through your eyes

Get the point

Rationalize

But there's still one thing

I can't explain away

Why am I happier today without you?

 

I'm not gonna let you poison my well

'Cos your good intentions pave the road to my hell

There's room for one person in my head

So I'll imagine youíre dead

 

You seem to believe

You've made up for traits I lack

Now I perceive

That opposites extract

And I won't look back

 

I used to think I needed you

To save me from rash things I might do

But now I've seen in retrospect

Wet blankets have the same effect on me

 

I'm not gonna be like you

Gonna do what I want

Not what you want me to do

And I don't want you to die,

That's not what I said

I'll just imagine youíre...

 

NO!

I'll imagine you're somewhere else

As happy as I am all by yourself

And if it helps bring peace on your head

You can imagine I'm

Dead.

Musicians:

Adam - vocals, guitars
Robbie Rist
- 12-string bass, vocals
Kurt Medlin - drums
Robert Ramos - additional vocals

Adam sez:

The second song on THE SCAPEGOAT FACTORY to deal with the recent and acrimonious breakup of the band (from whence also came the title). Like a lot of the songs on this album, there are a lot of conflicted emotions here, with a lyric about co-dependency, needing to kill someone off in your own head, and finally, realizing that carrying grudges hurts only yourself. This was the only SCAPEGOAT song that had been performed live prior to the album being recorded, with James Hazley on the drums, though Kurt does the honors here (in one of his finest performances, IMHO).

Robbie Rist plays the 12-string bass, which contributes to the Cheap Trick-like sound of the track. The bridge on this song is very peculiar, basically an attempt to make a bunch of disconnected chords fit together, and when I was about to junk it Robbie insisted "we can make it work" and crafted the bass line that helped tie it together. Like a lot of the songs on SCAPEGOAT, this is in an unusual key for a guitar-based song (it starts in Bb and then modulates to Db -- I think), and once again, led to some challenges in performing it.

The cluster of songs at the end of the album that seemed to be devoted to bashing unnamed ex-bandmembers may seem like a bit much. I agonzied over it at the time, and it's the reason behind the change of heart and emphatic rejection of bitterness that happens at the end of this song. But finally, I decided that as a songwriter, you try to write about what's really emotionally affecting you and make it as universal as you can. And I had really strong feelings about what happened that I needed to divest...keep in mind that around this time one of my ex-bandmates' wife had posted an entire website devoted to dissing me (without revealing that she was married to one of the principals), and then demanded that I link to it from my own website! (which I did, don't ask me why)

Once THE SCAPEGOAT FACTORY was finished I felt like I'd purged something really ugly and was in a different place as a person and as a songwriter. This song was a big part of that.

This song was recently used in the soundtrack to a Sci-Fi horror film! "Imagine You're Dead," get it?

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