Sports Bar

Release Date: 1/10





TV in the bathroom, can't you see
Yes I can now, when I pee
Can't look away, I can't break free
A cathode catheter for you and me

The last time I saw this many football jerseys
My high school team kicked the shit out of me
Now a smiling hostess has a number on her chest
To hide her heavy heaving high school breasts

Rah-rah-rah-rah-sis-boom-bah-bah Sports Bar
Rah-rah-rah-rah-sis-boom-bah-bah Sports Bar

I'm trying to hang out but it's getting me down
I think that soccer team just scored a touchdown
'Cause some big burly guy just threw a tantrum
Got a beer on my lap and a busted eardrum

My girl has buffalo wings and thighs
A garlic burger and curly fries
Some more potato skins, Jaegermeister and then
We're gonna make out to ESPN

Rah-rah-rah-rah-sis-boom-bah-bah Sports Bar
Rah-rah-rah-rah-sis-boom-bah-bah Sports Bar

Pack the leftovers in a greasy box
Stoppin' at Kroeger's for a bottle of Maalox
She's listening to the game and her eyes got a gleam
The Browns got her hot, now I got one for the team


Adam - lead vocal, guitar
Teresa Cowles - bass, vocals
Jon Braun - drums
Charlie Zayleskie - keyboards
Bill Stone - vocals

Adam sez:

A couple of days after the Pennsylvania Turnpike drive, but before we went to the studio to record HELLO CLEVELAND, some fans in Columbus, Ohio wanted to meet us for dinner. We agreed, and the place we wound up meeting was a massive sports bar called The Buckeye Hall of Fame. I thought the place was absolutely ridiculous, and in the sour mood I was in for most of the tour, immediately set about trashing the whole joint in song.

Doing the vocals for HELLO CLEVELAND was very intense. I had about four hours to do them all in. Keep in mind I had never sung these songs before ever, and I had a maximum of two or at most three takes to get the song right before I had to move on, and I'd already been singing for nearly three weeks straight. I hadn't properly finished the lyrics to "Sports Bar" when we went to the studio, and the whole session nearly fell apart when I got to this song. I had a lot of trouble getting the words to sing right; they were a mouthful. Once I got through this song, the dam was broken and we were home free.

The bit about "cornhole" was suggested by Bill Stone. Apparently it's some football maneuver or other. It's a midwestern thing.

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